Men: Do You Believe In A "Woman's Place?"

Do u belive a woman should stay at home & cook, clean, & take care of the kids while u work? Would you mind if u both worked and u both did the housework?

peanut butter wrote:

Do u belive a woman should stay at home & cook, clean, & take care of the kids while u work? Would you mind if u both worked and u both did the housework?

YOU KNOW WHAT...I WOULDNT MIND A WOMAN THAT STAYED HOME AND FOCUS ON THE STABILITY OF OUR HOME. IF IN FACT I WAS FINANCIALLY CAPABLE TO HANDLE THAT SITUATION I WOULD ALLOW IT. BUT IN THESE TRYING TIMES, A 2 INCOME HOUSEHOLD IS ALMOST A MANDATORY THING TO KEEP YOU AND YOUR FAMILY HAPPY AND LIVING COMFORTABLY. I HAVE NEVER TOLD A WOMAN TO STAY IN HER PLACE...I FEEL THAT IS HARSH AND NOT THE WAY IT SHOULD BE SPOKEN. I TELL A WOMAN SIMPLY IF SHE PLAYS HER ROLE AS A WOMAN, I WILL PLAY MY ROLE AS A MAN...
IF SHE WANTED TO PLAY BOTH ROLES...SHE DONT NEED A MAN!

-GOL

what do u consider "playing both roles?"

In my situation...my kids' fathers don't help out so EVERYTHING falls on me..but if I find a man that knows how to be a man I'll step back and let him help out....some women are used to having to do everything themselves and its hard for them to let go of that control.

Thanks GOL-- I feel you on that one! I do agree with peanut though---I think when women have to pick up that role it is hard for her to fall back and let her man be one. However, it should never be hard to let a man do what he is supposed to in the first place but being independent is hard on us and sometimes we don't know how to act if we haven't had a good one around-- you feel me?

It really is hard trying to hold evrything down by urself and I would really like to have a man help out...I know what it means to be a man's wife but I would have to work...I need to have an identity other than someone's wife and mother and most of all I need to have my own money u never know what may happen..its just best for women to have their own and not depend on a man for EVERYTHING. There is a way to be independent and let a man be a man...u just have to find that balance.

Peanut I sooo agree-- I was just in a similar situation with my ex husband and now i'm fucked up because I trusted him too much... So I am trying to find that balance...

I am naturally a nurturer anyways...I wouldn't mind staying home and taking care of the household...because I am an Athena's Goddess...I am able to do that anyway...I work usually only Friday and Saturday nights...if I had babies at home...I would rather it was me watching them then some stranger or having to depend on a friend or family member...and then that way I am also not missing out on their formative days...I would love nothing more than to be able to just chill out at home, keep the house clean and have a meal ready for my man and make sure that he is comfortable and happy when he comes home from a stressful day of work and commuting....

if u have kids...u won't be chillin at home...trust me...I know what its like to be a stay at home mom. Im also not married..but I know all too well what its like to be the only one taking care of the house...when I get married I expect my husband to help. I understand what a man needs but they need to understand that every once in a while I would like them to cook and clean..

like I said before I have to have my own identity..I can't just be somebody's wife &mother..u cant loose urself in ur man or ur marriage. Ur husband and ur marriage does not define who u r...they r a part of who u r.

I plan to get my degree & I can use it staying at home...like I said there is a balance...I've worked and I've stayed at home so I think I have a good idea how balance it out.

Well I do have a little one and I work from home...and I chill at home with her...I don't have to worry about commuting to work and dealing with all the stress of that...when i say chill...i don't mean in the literal sense where it means sit around and doing nothing...i do have my own identity and i do make my own money...i agree with you when you say that ur marriage and husband are a part of you ...not who you are...i know i have a good balance...

Famc-- I prefer for the next woman I get involved with to stay home and take care of us. A woman's role is so critical. Nurishing our house into a home is so key for our kids to see. It's time for US MEN to take back leadership and stop putting it on the woman.

I so agree Fam-- its time for the roles to be re-established and the man to take back his role and for the natural order of things to go back to the way they were.

@Peanut- I think the reason women especially women of color are so not into the traditional roles is because society tells us we are supposed to be independent and not depend on a man for anything and most men say well if she so independent she don't need me for nothing but some sex. We talk ourselves into believing that if we perform our duties in the roles God made specifically for each sex--we are not being ourselves or we are depending too much on the opposite sex,etc... Our families are broke down because women don't know how to step back and let a man lead and run his household and men don't act like they don't know how to step to the plate and take care of that role. I will be independent as a single women because I must but the man I marry next must be nothing but willing to step up and manage his family and not only know his role as a man, husband and father but practice this and know that I got his back 200%.